“You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted by your own affections.” (2 Cor 6:12)
“and the desires for other things entering in choke the word.” (Mk 4:19)
My God, I am humbled to start my day by coming to You, confessing You are God, that I am not, and considering before You these verses. I am Your child. You care for me. You work for my good, and You love me as no other ever can or will. This knowledge strengthens me for my day. You are not against me. This I know. You are my Father.
Today begins early with my meditating on these verses from You. I acknowledge the warning they give—things within me, and things outside me—that I need be always careful of. My own affections work against me. My own desires for things other than You and Your word end up choking the life You have granted me, and thereby that very life You intend Your word to accomplish in and through me. Dear God, forgive me. Do I still not understand the place and the power of Your word in this fallen world? In my own life? That Your word brings life and light to me, and to others?
Jesus tells me his words are life. He spoke of You. Peter writes Your word not only brings life but nurtures this life into a mature state. Yet, You tell me “I” stand in the way of this life achieving full design and fruitful benefit. You grant me life, Father. What have I done with it? I recall Your son warning about the light within, that if that light is actually darkness, then, indeed, how dark is that darkness that comes across as light but isn’t; that self-deception would so twist things and present its own darkened state as light. Further, that someone would view darkness as light such. God, have mercy on me. Lead me away from myself and every false light-bearer. May I always and only behold Your son as the light of the world and the light of my life. The morning star has arisen in my heart. May I walk in the light of Christ who has come.
It is written of Your Son that in Him was life, and that this unique life was, and is, the light of men (Jn 1:4). Jesus is the living word. I look at, examine and understand His life, as I would read a book. As I do this, I learn from You things hidden from before the creation of the world. He was with You. He knew You best of any other source. He created all, so he knows all things best. He knows me. He knows You. Jesus is the mediator between us, and he ever lives making intercession for me before You. He reveals You to me, thus he is light. I have him as the light of my life, spiritual light. He is light in my soul similar to how the sun is light to the world. Father, thank You for the gift of Your son. He is life from You to me. He is light from You to me. Forgive me of the sin, the darkness, I put against that light. Change my affections and desires to be more heavenly, so that Your word would grow and create fruit for the world to see and consume, thus others may draw life from You. These things I pray.
You permit me to understand, as I come to You through him. He is still the way, still the truth, and he is still the life in relation to You. He is the living word who manifests to us eternal life; that which he shared with You always, and which You have granted me to participate in with You, Your Son, and Spirit. Knowing You, through the participation of this relationship, is eternal life. Thank You, Father.
Also, Father, I have the written word. Through it I too understand who You are, what You are about, and by this record I relate to people; some transformed by Your renewing love and grace; some still in darkness. I learn of and participate in the thread of The Redeemed. Your Spirit’s labor preserving the written record stands to this very day. Thus, Father, when I seem to myself suspended between time and eternity—that position of self-reflection where I labor to see life and all things that I can from the lens of divine revelation and life with You through Christ by the Spirit—I best know the assurance of our relationship, and I best know the reality and presence of what most works against all You have ordained for my good—the presence of self (that remnant and stain of my unholy being, the flesh, stained into all that I am, and ready to live and grow through all I do, unless subdued and denied life; which only comes through my pursuit of life with You through Your Son by the Spirit, and the pursuit of godliness). Thank You, Father.
So, I come to these verses, my God. Your faithful servant the apostle Paul instructs me that my own affections can restrict, narrow my way, or crush me. Why would I ever want that! Rationally, I wouldn’t. But we are not dealing with illumined reason here. Paul speaks as an apostle to the Corinthians, as one who has opened his heart to them with Your revelation and his transformed life, pouring out both to them for their good. And they shut out both! His redeemed and renewed life is a gateway of divine grace and favor displayed for their edification and benefit, yet when he presents this to them their hearts are shut. I picture the image in Revelation 3:20: a hardened heart, shut and locked from the inside, presented with divine grace and favor, yet so committed to self that it shuts out God! And both of these passages are in the context of the church and Your ministry to those classified as saints, or separated ones. Dear God! You have illumined me to see and know that my own affections can shut out Your ministry of life to me, and the consequence, while it may appear as life because “I” retain control, is really narrowing my way and crushing my very soul, because is welds me further and further into myself where Your light grows dimmer and the darkness deeper. Dear God, bring to me Your light and favor. Renew my heart with Your grace, love and truth. Change my life denying passions and affections for heavenly appetites that pursue and honor You. May I hear only the voice of my Shepherd and not follow the voice of any other; especially that of my sinful self. For that voice, above all my God, seems to be the loudest, most clear, most influencing, of all. Forgive me, Father, and please lead me away from living from, by and for my own affections to living from, by and for what is according to Your heart. Thank You.
Also, You warn me from Your word about things outside of me that I might give too much attention to, and that these will end up taking away that life You give me through Your word. My God, I am not Your Son. My heart longs for so much that I either have or don’t have. In and of myself I am not content or satisfied. I am a creature, and I have not life in myself. You and Your Son have life in Yourselves, and this life You have brought me into. Thus, why the torment? It is because I give preference to other things, and these they are which kill-off the life I share with You. Both cannot grow together. How do I ever expect that gift of Your life to flourish and grow in my heart, so that I bear fruit to Your glory, when it is Your word working in and through me that is the source of fruit, and I choose to desire anything but Your word! As Your Son reveals in John 15, there is a danger of thinking I am drawing life from Him when in reality I am not. Father, may there be sufficient fruit in my life—even if that be confession of sin, which is itself of faith—for You to prune me and carefully craft my days, such that the end would be more honor, praise, and glory to You, Your Son, and Spirit, and that I would find rest from desires for other things and know the greater and truer pathway of life from the Living and written word. Father, I am so weak in and of myself. Please grant me the grace and strength to make it through my day. Lord Jesus, may I know your presence and the ministry of the Spirit in all things. May the Living and the written word be as lights to me this and each day. As I draw light and life from these, other unholy desires will disappear. Be with me and guide me through each step of my day. Amen
Greenies Make No Sense
7 years ago
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